{....A Year Later...}

Try...Try again.

(my first run in the new shoes 1/13/18)

With the exception of a run here and there, I've officially taken off 18 months. I've allowed myself to gain weight...to be depressed...and have forgotten myself along the way. What once was a sport that energized me, became a place of fear and anger. Nashville broke me. In ways I can't even understand. It stripped me of every ounce of my dignity and in that moment, it defeated me. Not because I didn't PR, but because I allowed the mental talk to derail my entire running journey. But I refuse to stay in that place of defeat. I refuse to let that one race define me.

So....this weekend I went and bought a new pair of shoes. (what is it about a new pair of shoes that make you think you can conquer the world?!) The Altra Torin IQ. They have a built in sensor that gives real-time feedback on running form so that you can make adjustments and run more efficiently. In the past, I've struggled with my piriformis acting up and I knew it was a form issue. I'm hopeful that the feedback from these shoes will help me alleviate that obstacle. 

I also went through my calendar and penciled in some races. I haven't raced since May 2016. I committed to completing the Women Can Run Clinic and to pushing my body again. I know that I do better when I have clearly defined goals ahead of me and have something to work toward. Adding races to my calendar gives me that competition my soul craves.

And....I laced up my shoes and went for a run. Not a walk. Although I did walk some. But a run. I would run a bit and walk a bit. It was cold. Bitter cold (27 degrees). My body was sore. But you know what....I finished a mile. I didn't want to quit. I wanted to finish!!

I look back at pictures of me when I was running and I see someone who was happy, healthy, and enjoying life on a daily basis. I want that girl back!

So here's to 2018!!!

Maybe I'll even get better at this blogging thing ;)